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PostPosted: Wed Jan 10, 2018 12:59 pm 
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jl55378008 wrote:
maze_or_bowie wrote:
Don't forget to factor in fapping usage.

I don't fap into TP. That's a waste of valuable resources.


Do people actually use TP?

Bath rag ftw

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“If someone has a gun and is trying to kill you, it would be reasonable to shoot back with your own gun.”

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PostPosted: Wed Jan 10, 2018 1:01 pm 
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Damn it Blee, you stepped on my next post. I figured someone would say something smarmy and I'd say "I prefer to use Blee's mom."

But you outsmarted me. This time Image


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 10, 2018 1:02 pm 
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I've had three cups of coffee already. I'm on my game

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“If someone has a gun and is trying to kill you, it would be reasonable to shoot back with your own gun.”

― Dalai Lama XIV


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 10, 2018 1:45 pm 
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cantonjester wrote:
However, simultaneous, sixteen-minutes-apart replies to this thread seem to be doing the trick.

I’m bored.


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 10, 2018 2:46 pm 
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LADOR2012 wrote:
wipe until you see blood

My life is the opposite of this :(


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 10, 2018 2:58 pm 
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LADOR2012 wrote:
fap until you see blood


ftfy

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wooten123 wrote:

you don't know shit about me.

only what you think you know.

if you came at me I could kill you within 3 seconds with no weapon.


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 10, 2018 3:00 pm 
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jl55378008 wrote:
maze_or_bowie wrote:
Don't forget to factor in fapping usage.

I don't fap into TP. That's a waste of valuable resources.



Not to mention all the little bits of jizz soaked tp that get stuck to your dick.


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 10, 2018 6:04 pm 
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thank god i'm not the only one

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wooten123 wrote:

you don't know shit about me.

only what you think you know.

if you came at me I could kill you within 3 seconds with no weapon.


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 10, 2018 6:17 pm 
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By now, my body knows what to do, and is a real champ at it.

Morning coffee > SLAM > efficient wiping > shower > DONE for the day

When in poor restroom circumstances (festivals, camping, third world countries with 90%+ unacceptable facilities) my colon steps up and says “Hey, I got it for a while, have a nice day” and I don’t have to shit in challenging circumstances.


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 10, 2018 9:35 pm 
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pottery wrote:
By now, my body knows what to do, and is a real champ at it.

Morning coffee > SLAM > efficient wiping > shower > DONE for the day

When in poor restroom circumstances (festivals, camping, third world countries with 90%+ unacceptable facilities) my colon steps up and says “Hey, I got it for a while, have a nice day” and I don’t have to shit in challenging circumstances.


That is a fined tuned machine.

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wooten123 wrote:

you don't know shit about me.

only what you think you know.

if you came at me I could kill you within 3 seconds with no weapon.


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 10, 2018 9:37 pm 
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I feel like if I had a bidet I'd still wipe after the bidet.

Who wants an wet asshole with clothes on?


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 10, 2018 10:21 pm 
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You need an all-terrain blowdryer


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 13, 2018 3:52 pm 
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Just had a bidet attachment installed. Game changer 8-)

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wooten123 wrote:

you don't know shit about me.

only what you think you know.

if you came at me I could kill you within 3 seconds with no weapon.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 13, 2018 3:56 pm 
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maze_or_bowie wrote:
Just had a bidet attachment installed. Game changer 8-)



Don't have one, but have used one. They're awesome. Kinda weird that they're not more common in the US.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 13, 2018 3:57 pm 
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cpj wrote:
I feel like if I had a bidet I'd still wipe after the bidet.

Who wants an wet asshole with clothes on?


well do you pat dry your asshole after you shower?

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wooten123 wrote:

you don't know shit about me.

only what you think you know.

if you came at me I could kill you within 3 seconds with no weapon.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 13, 2018 4:58 pm 
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metamunch wrote:
maze_or_bowie wrote:
Just had a bidet attachment installed. Game changer 8-)



Don't have one, but have used one. They're awesome. Kinda weird that they're not more common in the US.


Espically since they are super cheap ($30) and can be installed in 15 minutes by anyone with two hands

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“If someone has a gun and is trying to kill you, it would be reasonable to shoot back with your own gun.”

― Dalai Lama XIV


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 13, 2018 6:12 pm 
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metamunch wrote:
maze_or_bowie wrote:
Just had a bidet attachment installed. Game changer 8-)



Don't have one, but have used one. They're awesome. Kinda weird that they're not more common in the US.


big TP has this country by the short hairs

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wooten123 wrote:

you don't know shit about me.

only what you think you know.

if you came at me I could kill you within 3 seconds with no weapon.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 13, 2018 7:11 pm 
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This thread inspired me to cut down on TP, and gosh-dang it I have pushed my finger through the paper now more times than I can count on my hand. Fuck! Sorry environment, but need to protect my fingertips from scraping my sphincter. Now more of this 3 Square bullshit.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 13, 2018 10:07 pm 
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Got a friend who says the only time he gets any ass is when his thumb goes through the TP when he is wiping.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 13, 2018 11:00 pm 
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Definitely need a little TP to pat dry after the bidet. But is 1/16 of what I used to use.

Also, is there a term for when your finger pushes through the TP and you touch your own poo-ey shithole?


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 13, 2018 11:50 pm 
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it's called "oh shit"

based on what people say when it happens

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wooten123 wrote:

you don't know shit about me.

only what you think you know.

if you came at me I could kill you within 3 seconds with no weapon.


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 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Sat Jan 13, 2018 11:57 pm 
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To me the line for a country being a shithole country or not is how common bidet are.

Seriously. It's barbaric not to use one. I'm seriously considering leaving the USA for good cause I can't shit anywhere but my own house now. Very inconvenient

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“If someone has a gun and is trying to kill you, it would be reasonable to shoot back with your own gun.”

― Dalai Lama XIV


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